...a farrago of thoughts...

editing.

2011-01-20T22:31:00.000-06:00

i am editing photos from a recent shoot with my friend and her boyfriend of two years.

this is one of my favorites. its candid. i like candid photos.

2011....whoa

2011-01-11T15:26:00.000-06:00

where in the hell did you come from, 2011?

when i was a kid, i never thought i'd make it over 21.

not because i'm reckless and take too many risks with my life.
but because i've never thought that far into the future.
this is a problem. because now...i don't see myself doing much past 30.
assuming i make it that far.
what 24 year old doesn't think about the future?
gah! its a mess.

things i'm doing in 2011:

1. weight watchers: i've lost one pound. i started less than a week ago. so i guess that's okay. i have realized that i hate how i look. i'm not doing it for other people...i don't care what my friends think....they're not the type to ditch you because you gained a few pounds. i have a friend who says "i only have pretty friends." and its true. all of her friends are pretty. not necessarily in the conventional way, but she sees beauty in most people. and we all appreciate that.
but in all reality...i suppose we all look pretty much on point.
i'm not doing it so i can get a boyfriend, which seems to be most young girls reason for losing weight...i have one of those. and he doesn't care how i look, or so he says. i told him to imagine me at 300lbs....he said "okay..i'd still love you."
as adorable as that is...i'm definitely not letting it get that bad.
i'm doing this for me.
not my friends. not my boyfriend. or my opera director. my choir director. and definitely not for the pathetic scrawny sorostitute who judges me at the bar for being fat. go eat a piece of chicken.
i'm doing it for me. because ultimately i hate myself.
and for once in my life...i'm going to try and love myself.
which is an extremely foreign concept.
considering i haven't actually liked who i was since second grade.
so here goes nothin'.

2. photography:
holy moly. i've got several jobs lined up allllll semester. its gonna be awesome.
starting with a couples shoot tomorrow.
after that...i think i have 3 headshots lined up.
a high school choir valentines day revue
and who knows what else. i'm sure some recitals and other random events will pop up.

3. catering:
once again, my spring semester is starting off catering for the CTME Leadership Summit.
i love this event. its a lot of fun and great for networking.
luckily its an organization run by a lot of my close friends, so i keep getting hired back.

4. CHICAGO!!!!!!
thanks to ACDA and chorale i get to go to chicago in march.
and its the week before spring break....so i almost get two weeks off from school.
hopefully midterms won't leave permanent damage on me.
i'm super excited about this trip. again..lots of networking and learning opportunities.
because i'm an officer in our collegiate ACDA chapter, i get to leave two days before chorale so i can attend all of the workshops and help my professors with theirs.
then chorale shows up and the fun really gets started.
we get to be the demonstration choir for an internationally known german conductor and one of the foremost experts on Bach. he studied under Leonard Bernstein and has founded 5+ Bach festivals all over the world.
basically, he's amazing.
and getting to work with him is one of the most amazing opportunities my choir has ever had.
SO EXCITED.
now me and my fellow officers just need to get our ipads and on point casual business wear and blow the other collegiate chapters out of the water.

5. vocalbire:
we're doing the byrd mass for 4 voices.
enough said.

6. graduation:
...maybe?

7. new orleans:
i might be going to new orleans TWICE this year.
once for fun. once for my friend's bachelorette party.

8. KoK:
the kouncil will be totally on point this year.
we will be epic.

9. choir camp:
again....the kouncil runs camp....so it'll be amazing.
we will change children's lives.

so that's it....thus far.
we'll see what actually happens.

the sing-off :: night 3

2010-12-15T13:16:00.000-06:00

intro: 21 guns by green day.

i don't know this song. i stopped listening to green day when they started sounding like crap.

but i suppose i like their version. it sounds like a feel-good motivational song.

oh...and there were fireworks....snazzy.

rock and roll:

the backbeats : you give love a bad name

i just love them. they're great. i hope they keep it up.

different soloist....i hope it doesn't hurt them. she's not as entertaining as the usual girl.

the judges didn't like it...ughhh why, backbeats, why?

street corner symphony : creep

super simple opening. this guy has a beautiful voice. its got soul and its edgy.

the judges liked it. so did i.

jerry lawson & talk of the town : (i can't get no) satisfaction

they look so snazzy in their leather blazers.

they're always good.

classic. you can't argue with this mess.

on the rocks : pour some sugar on me

there is a lot of pelvic thrusting going on.

oh lert. there is a lot of sex on that stage. lol.

besides the sex appeal they sound pretty darn good. the harmonies were tight

and the percussion was on point.

groove for thought : changes

the beginning felt like it had no pitch center....

the youngest member is on the solo today....she's got a pretty voice.

oh hell..she just messed up. either her voice caught or she didn't know the words...ahhhh!

they didn't leave the jazz world....that's not gonna get them very far.

committed : every breath you take

the soloist's voice is a little nasal....but it still sounds good.

the bridge doesn't sound in tune.....

but their unison ending was on poooinnnt!

they're not rock and rollers....enough said.

guilty pleasures:

the backbeats : love shack

aww cute outfits!!!! total hippie and candy sweet.

the percussionist doesn't look comfortable in that dress.

very cute performance.

street corner symphony : come on eileen

i LOVE this song. and i love their outfits!

the 8 bars after the intro were awkward....but they're kind of making up for it.

i think the percussion is going too fast.

they look like they're having a lot of fun.

jerry lawson & talk of the town : easy

oooooo falsetto! get it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

another great performance.

groove for thought : you make my dreams

that was fun. they kinda screwed it up in their last song. so i'm glad they redeemed themselves.

on the rocks : kyrie

i LOVE this song. it used to come on at work and everyone made fun of me for liking it.

the opening solo....awkward...almost too high for him.

i love this song because there are beautiful harmonies built in...so all of the creative singers in the world don't have the opportunity to make up their own..and ruin it for me.

but they didn't ruin it for me.

committed : i want it that way

oh lert. mama doesn't like boy bands.

this kind of reminds me of 7th grade when the "beckstreet boys" performed this at the pop show. lol. mess.

they sound pretty good. and they attempted the sexy thing...which...perhaps they shouldn't have done.

BAHAH then nick lachey gets angry cuz it wasn't 98degrees. lame.

at the end of the show....groove for thought was sent home. they had a good run.

the sing-off :: night 2

2010-12-10T00:22:00.000-06:00

i love when i forget that things are on and then they back up on hulu......so then i can just watch this stuff for hours. :)

they opened with Use Somebody by Kings of Leon....which i, of course, loved.

and now i shall give my moment by moment opinions of the second night of the sing-off.

on the rocks - live your life

i love the cardigans, ties and dark wash jeans. so cute. and they're pretty decent dancers.....pretttty fly for a bunch of preppy boys from oregon.

i love how much energy they have. they remind me of the beelzebubs from last season.

street corner symphony - hey, soul sister

let me preface this by saying i cannot stand this song. but i will give them a chance.

i think homeboy should shave the stache.

but he has a beautiful voice.

i think it sounded pretty darn good.

eleventh hour - just the way you are

the high schoolers in the show...i like their story.

and i mostly like this song.

the percussion was rushed at the beginning....they seem a little off...rhythmically.

their lead female is a bit nasal....its like her tongue is getting in the way...and they're all a little pitchy....

i wish they had done better.

jerry lawson & talk of the town - mercy

i grew up listening to their style of music. so i'm gonna love this no matter what they do.

i love their contrasting outfits annnnd this week i love how jerry was wearing a boutonnière

vocally i just love it. its soooo old school. mama like.

unfortunately eleventh hour was the group to go home in the first half.

the backbeats - break even

i just love them. and i love this song.

committed - apologize

again...fabulous. they're just so good.

they're so together. and all of their voices are like chocolate.

mmmm.

groove for thought - cooler than me

they really picked a song that worked for their lead's voice.

and they put a totally cool jazz spin on the song.

they made me like that song. that's impressive.

the whiffenpoofs - haven't met you yet

i love this song. it reminds me of the boy.

i like that they keep their choral background instead of conforming to what everyone does.

and ginger homeboy has a pretty voice. asian boy needs to loosen up.

much to my dismay the whiffenpoofs were sent home.

they were so adorable.

i can't wait for the next episode!!!!! =)

the sing-off :: night 1

2010-12-09T14:36:00.000-06:00

oh sweet merciful lert....the sing-off is back

mama is happy.

most of the groups are pretty good. i love that there is a high school group (eleventh hour) on the show...its like the real glee! lol. they were pretty good for a bunch of kids.

i LOVE the whiffenpoofs.

they remind me of chanticleer...and we all know how much i loooove chanticleer.

the backbeats were amazing.

however, i think almost half of their members were on the last season of the sing-off.

street corner symphony was pretty good. i like how they are realllll southern.

and of course i loved on the rocks....i love all male groups. they sound so much better.

men of note....i'm okay with them getting kicked off....homeboy's voice is too tinny and he modified his vowels in a way that i cannot appreciate.

committed was great as well. they killed it.

groove for thought was alright...i like vocal jazz....we'll see if that works for them.

jerry lawson and talk of the town was classic a cappella at its best. again...we'll see how they can work with more current music.

pitch slapped was just a disappointment. they're from freakin' berklee college of music. i expected way more out of them. ohhhh well, peace out pitch slapped.

adverputt

2010-11-03T11:59:00.000-05:00

i bring you....adverputt....

online putt putt golf.

its challenging and it kills time.

enjoy.

Adverputt

FEED ME....Chanticleer

2010-10-29T12:55:00.001-05:00

today's post isn't going to be about food for your stomach....

its about food for your soul.

last night the multiple grammy award winning ensemble, Chanticleer, performed at my university.

they sing all kinds of music.

plainchant and palestrina all the way up to modern compositions by san francisco DJs.

and they do all of it well.

nothing falls short.

my favorite song of the night was a cover of the song Cells Planets by Erika Lloyd from the indie rock band Little Grey Girlfriend.

the lyrics are amazing.

listen. read. fall in love.

feed your soul.

also, we got the opportunity to hang out with three of the guys from chanticleer.
and they are amazing. they're so sweet.
i hope they had fun with us. and i hope we get to see them again.

FEED ME...Halloween treats

2010-10-22T10:26:00.001-05:00

so in the spirit of my last post...and because halloween is NEXT WEEKEND...fun and fabulous halloween treats for your halloween party...or if you just wanna make fun food at eat it by yourself...which i have been known to do. lol.

Pumpkin Cream Cheese Truffles

for the rest of the list and recipes....

The Stir: 20 Halloween Recipes

enjoy.

PUMPKINS!

2010-10-20T12:32:00.000-05:00

halloween is almost here.

i love halloween...i love everything about it.

it's not just about dressing up in fun costumes and being someone else...i do an opera at least once a year..so that's a regular occurrence.

i love the mystery of the unknown...the paranormal tv shows...the history of the holiday...etc. etc. etc.

i also love pumpkins. love love LOVE them.

so in the spirit of halloween..and my love for things out of the ordinary...

Celestial Pumpkins

and the more traditional jack-o-lantern...

black magic carved pumpkins

Music Monday: Willow - Whip My Hair

2010-10-18T21:46:00.000-05:00

willow - whip my hair

i wonder how many children were treated for whiplash during the making of this video.

feed me...CUPCAKES.

2010-10-15T13:49:00.000-05:00

cupcakes have blown up everywhere it seems.

there are cupcake shops in almost every city (except mine)...they're in malls, strip centers, city squares, historic towns, and even in tiny trailers that travel around big cities.

i think its fantastic. i always thought cupcakes were fun when i was a kid. they're like your own little cake. and who really needs a whole cake anyway....a cupcake is just the right size.

well, during my many hours on stumbleupon, i have discovered a fantastic cupcake website with tons of fabulous recipes.

i want to try them all...but that would probably make me look more like a cupcake than a woman.

but i digress....

Ming Makes Cupcakes

Abendlied - The King's Singers

2010-10-11T11:48:00.000-05:00

maybe i'm crazy...but i can physically feel this kind of music.

its hard to explain, i feel it in the middle of my chest...like my heart skips a beat.

the dissonance and resolutions are perfect...and amazing.

TED: Mike Rowe, dirty jobs

2010-09-30T22:34:00.003-05:00

Mike Rowe celebrates dirty jobs | Video on TED.com

1. mike rowe is delicious.

2. sometimes when i watch dirty jobs i feel as if he's mocking them....but this video mostly proved me wrong.

enjoy.

the princess and the frog....i'mma change my face!

2010-09-23T18:18:00.001-05:00

so, i found this website...which morphs your face to look like other things...children, adults, paintings...and other ethnicities. here are my results...

afro-caribbean

okay i finally believe y'all now...my brother is a carbon copy of me..and we look like twins.

you win.

erin yee! lol. not really. but it's me.....just asian.

omg, i need to moisturize more.

and as a painting. lol. i like this one the best....

if you'd like to warp your face into this and more...visit Face Transformer

All of my Friends are Dead...wtf?

2010-09-22T14:38:00.000-05:00

All of my friends are dead.

dear stumbleupon...

WTF.

this is really morbid.

some of them are mildly amusing....but mostly just morbid.

fern - south africa

2010-09-21T10:53:00.000-05:00

fern in knysna, south africa.

it was early...cold...damp...and foggy.

but everything was covered in dew. i took SO many pictures.

bokeh type

2010-09-15T10:56:00.000-05:00

Bokeh Type

random website...pretty colors...unfortunately you can only type in six characters at a time.

lucky for me my name only has six letters.

win. =)

i'm thinking about changing random wednesdays into wtf wednesdays.

because there's a chance that most of the websites i post are probably gonna make you say...

"...wtf is that?"

we'll see....

sunflower

2010-09-14T09:23:00.001-05:00

sunflower at a park in san antonio.

Horchata -Vampire Weekend

2010-09-13T11:28:00.001-05:00

good morning....

i woke up from a 12 hour slumber...yes 12 hours... i feel like death...with this song stuck in my head.

now that's not too odd considering i wake up many mornings with this song stuck in my head. i'm pretty much obsessed with it.

unfortunately the band hasn't shot a video for this amazing song yet...i'm anxious to see what they come up with. so here is a slightly craptastic video with lyrics included, which i suppose is a good thing considering sometimes i can't understand a damn thing they say.

enjoy.

this song makes me want to drive around with the windows down.

or skip around in an open field.

and most of all...drink horchata....despite the ridiculous amount of calories i'm sure it has.

i honestly can't decide for myself what this song actually means.

maybe its about a new love...and then that new love withers away just like the last one did.

maybe its about finding happiness in whatever you're doing.

who knows...well..i suppose vampire weekend does.

musically i think this song is fantastic...

it starts out pretty sparse with just vocals and some tinkering kind of sounds.

then all of a sudden..BAM its all there. backup vocals, electronic noises, guitar, drums, etc.

the song just keeps building and building. even when the instrumentation drops below 2-3 instruments you can still feel the momentum driving the song to the end.

my favorite part is when the strings come in.

at that point i feel like breaking into a full sprint...running toward....i dunno...love? happiness? who knows...but at least my big ass is running.

this blog needs direction

2010-09-12T12:48:00.000-05:00

this blog has sat here for quite some time now with no real direction.

that will change this week.

for some reason i have been inspired to allow this blog to reflect my day to day life and the things i'm passionate about...which roughly fall into the following categories:

music, photography, traveling, learning, reading, food, and exploring and discovering new things about the world around me.

thus i have decided my goal for this blog.

every day (God willing) i will update this blog according to a daily theme...

music monday: the music/song i'm currently obsessed with...or whatever is stuck in my head.

photography tuesday: 70% of the time a picture i've taken. 30% someone else's. and mostly from my travels.

random wednesday: i find myself looking at the most random websites....so i'll post what i find. and probably give my opinion.

TED/youtube thursday: i also manage to fall in love with a new TED or youtube video on a weekly basis. sometimes they're hysterical...sometimes it makes you think....or cry....or want to get off your ass and make a difference in the world.

feed me friday: i am a foodie. i can't help it. my grandparents were chefs in new orleans and they have instilled the same passion for food they have into my soul. i cannot deny it. recipes, restaurant reviews, fabulous finds at the grocery store, hopefully a trip or two to whole foods.

on saturday and sunday i will most likely rest. or blog about what happened during the week.

there's a low chance anyone will read...but i think this will help me feel balanced. like i'm doing something good for myself...and maybe others.

i hope you enjoy...i know i will.

summer of 2010....i feel like a gypsy.

2010-08-29T21:35:00.000-05:00

wow, i have failed yet again to keep up with this blog. i'm just too busy. which really is no excuse.

however, i have been without a computer since easter sunday and i haven't stayed in one place for more than a month. so i suppose that is a legitimate excuse.

let's recap the summer....

May:

Finals. blah.

moved out of the hell hole i was living in. thank the lert.

stayed in san antonio for a few days....then i went to

SOUTH AFRICA.

amazing.

may 19-june 1.

it was the best two weeks of my life. hands down.

it was life changing.

the people i met there are by far the most welcoming and beautiful people i have ever met.

the food was amazingly good.

i'm obsessed with malva now.

i will go back one day. i have to.

June:

went back to san antonio....lived there for almost a month.

that was crazy. i felt like a housewife.

and there's nothing really wrong with that.

i almost enjoyed it....SHOCK, right?

moved back to san marcos into a much better apartment with amazing people.

i am so lucky to have these people in my life.

then we prepped for choir camp.

July:

choir camp. amazing.

we had some fantastic campers this year.

and for the first time i actually tried to get to know my campers.

and i am so glad i did. i met some of the most amazing students.

i hope they keep coming back and enjoying the camp.

for some of them, camp is honestly the only time they get to escape their hometowns and their parents and whatever crap goes on in their homes.

that's why i'm a counselor...

i also got to take a family trip to table rock lake in missouri.

which was fantastic.

a week on a boat...with my family and our friends.

i couldn't have asked for a more relaxing week.

and i got a killer tan. :)

August:

gettin' krunk with my friends.

TLC - Todd's Little Choir in baytown.

amazing music with amazing people.

i got to meet some incredible people and make beautiful music.

there were 8 of us in one house...a bunch of gays and a few girls. lol.

thus Mammy and the Gays was born.

we might open a restaurant one day.

and that was some damn good food. :)

then school started.

i made both top ensembles at my university.

which is very exciting.

we start rehearsals tomorrow.

it's gonna be very different, but hopefully a lot of fun.

and now it's time for bed.

ciao.

they grow up too fast...

2010-05-14T23:42:00.000-05:00

my brother is graduating soon...he was just a baby like....yesterday.

my cousins are growin' up so fast....

and 8 and 9 year old girls are prancing around on stage in almost nothing dancing to "single ladies" by beyonce.

Little Girls - Single Ladies

disgusting.

the end.

2010-05-07T13:11:00.000-05:00

the semester is OVER.

i took my archaeology final this morning.

i swear...that class makes me so scatterbrained.

but, its over.

over over over.

i need a nap.

i'm going to africa on may 15th.

oh. my. goodness.

i got my safari bag: a green leather Fossil crossbody bag. i LOVE it.

now i just need a few more tops and a pair of jeans that actually fits...no more falling off my booty. lol.

i'm pondering bringing my boojie Dynasty yacht hat.

though, if i wore it...dr. martin would never let me live it down.

the new friskies commercial that's running on hulu.com is way too trippy.

its like a psychedelic trip for cats. mmm catnip.

too bad my cat never really watched tv.

okay...time to go hang out with my little. :)

another semester

2010-04-27T21:44:00.002-05:00

i seriously suck at updating this blog.

it doesn't help that my computer has stopped working.

well...the HD is fine...but the screen quit on me.

pinche screen.

i'm sending it back to Apple tomorrow.

i'm going to south africa in less than one month.

LESS than ONE month.

oh my sweet jesus.

safaris...elephants...lions...giraffes.

too bad we can't go into the ocean...it will be the height of great white shark season. no water for us....unless of course we want to be eaten alive.

however, we have a ridiculous amount of music to prepare AND memorize.

including a two choir arrangement of Cindy...which is a pain in the ass.

in other news...i went and enjoyed the weather today.

i never go outside and enjoy the weather.

i typically hate spring time and lovely weather. however today i decided to take advantage of it.

i went out to prospect green space...only to find that the city hasn't kept up with it.

and they've gotten rid of all of the informational plaques scattered around the property.

it kinda sucks.

i hope they're just re-working the stuff and making it more interesting or something.

however, i have a fear they're going to try and get rid of it.

there's a damn highway going through the back half of the green space. which seriously cuts into the hiking trails and i'm sure it has destroyed plenty of animals' natural habitats. not to mention the freakin' noise pollution it creates. i swear i could hear the construction vehicles and jackhammers from miles away. UGH. so annoyed.

on the bright side, it was a nice day, and i took my nikon and got some great shots.

in other other news...

i've been listening to a lot indie rock lately.

which is a TOTAL change from my usual top 40/hip-hop stuff.

and i've always listened to indie rock....just not at this magnitude.

i'm completely obsessed.

i just wish Sirius XMU would play more Passion Pit...then i'd be overjoyed.

okay...time to watch Castle.

obsession.

2010-03-04T20:22:00.002-06:00

i am obsessed...

no, scratch that..addicted...

with painting my nails.

ADDICTED.

i painted my nails yesterday...and then i did a second coat today just for the hell of it. but right now i cannot resist the urge to paint them again. this is ridiculous. i might just french tip them because that takes longer and its more satisfying.

i have also discovered a new nail color that i like...

its kinda grandma-ish...but it's pretty and shimmery and it whitens my nails.

L'oreal - In the Buff #150

it's a nice alternative to the awkward cloudy nude/pink colors that you can find.

in other news....

i've started watching Heroes.

my friends started watching it months ago and i never jumped on the bandwagon with them.

but at the persistence of another influence...i'm now watching it.

starting at season one.

which is great because thanks to the olympics NONE of my shows have been on. or they've been showing re-runs. it makes my hulu.com moments really bland.

thank goodness i have a netflix account. :)

in other OTHER news...

my brother and his girlfriend are coming to visit tomorrow!!

i can't wait. he's never come to visit me since i moved to san marcos 5ish years ago.

hopefully it'll be a good experience.

as long as he doesn't start shit with the roommates, i'll be happy. :)

oh my gosh, i totally forgot to mention the other fantastic things going on in my life...

chorale went on tour. it was great.

it went as follows:
Wednesday: leave at 9am for Amarillo. Arrive in Amarillo and SLEEP.

Thursday: Drive to Denver, Colorado...play in Denver, Colorado....which included a FANTASTIC dinner at The Buckhorn Exchange. mmmm meat.

Friday: Wake up in Denver...rehearsal...sound check...get ready...ACDA concert..premiered two pieces. get back on the bus...drive back to Amarillo. arrive in Amarillo at THREE IN THE FREAKIN' MORNING. sleep.

Saturday: wake up...drive to Oklahoma. rehearsal at Lake Creek Baptist Church...eat lunch...off to Quartz Mountain Resort....SO BEAUTIFUL. rehearsal..hiking...concert....dinner...BAR....afterparty...SLEEP.

Sunday: wake up...church service at Lake Creek Baptist Church....epic and moving...almost got a little weepy...luckily my heart is made of stone. lunch...back home.

epic trip.

and now its time to do laundry and clean my apartment.

WAM Blog 1

2010-01-29T16:22:00.002-06:00

So...as part of my Writing About Music class i have to submit 10 blogs.

and instead of just sending them in to my professor...i'm going to make them part of my own blog. so here it goes....

Music - is it for the audience or the musicians?

As a musician, you constantly ask yourself, "who am I doing this for?" Most of the time, one comes up with two possible options...I'm doing this for myself and my fellow musicians or I'm doing this for the audience. Personally, I believe music is for BOTH the musician and the audience. The audience shows up for concerts and performances because they want to be there or they're required to be there. So, as a musician, you must adequately prepare the selected repertoire so the audience isn't disappointed and so the audience enjoys your presentation of the selected works. On the other hand, music is for the musician as well. Without the music, there would be no musician. Thus, music must be for the musician. We learn, practice and perform music for various reasons. We do these things to better our musical talents and abilities, to expand our knowledge and repertoire, and to get as close to perfect as humanly possible. Outside of that we do it for the pure love of music. A musician who doesn’t love music isn’t a musician at all. Another idea comes to mind with this subject. Musicians often want to influence lives with the music they share with others. We want our interpretation of the music make a difference on someone’s life. We want someone to hear us sing or play and think “oh my goodness, how have I gone my entire life without this amazing sound? I’m going to continue listening and maybe even learn to play an instrument or sing”. As musicians, we want the joy we feel playing and singing music to be available to everyone. Either way it’s a win-win situation. Music makes musicians happy and music makes the audience happy, provided that it’s good.

i want to live alone

2010-01-11T17:00:00.002-06:00

i'm seriously considering asking my roommates to vacate.

our utility bill is gonna be crazy this month, they've been doing laundry nonstop for 3 days.

is that necessary? they cannot possibly have that much to wash.

in other news...school starts again in a week.

i'm going to have a seriously rough time this semester.

sooo many classes, and they're "real" classes. not music classes, which i can just breeze through for the most part.

it's gonna be difficult.

2010 is still rockin' on the way it started, besides the bullshit roommate crap.

i think i hear them clearing the washer...i must pounce.

ciao.

oh no, not again.

2010-01-03T23:18:00.002-06:00

i've forgotten to keep up with this blog yet again.

christmas was great.

new years was CRAZY.

absolute madness.

but...very good things came from the madness.

and it wasn't a bad kind of madness...it just wasn't madness i was expecting.

2010 has been fan-freakin-tastic.

i really hope this keeps up.

we went out to The Bonham in San Antonio last night.

we had a blast. a lot of us hadn't been out in a loooong time.

then we went to a party near UTSA.

and..it was alright..but not nearly as krunk as our parties here.

as my friend put it: alpha pi and gamma phi..keeping the standards high.

and its oh so true.

Jersey Shore

2009-12-13T20:47:00.002-06:00

wtf is this show?

1. the girls are NOT pretty.

2. the boys are NOT handsome.

3. they're all bat-shit CRAZY.

why do people fill their minds with this trash??

goals.

2009-12-02T01:12:00.002-06:00

i figured it out.
i have a goal.

graduate in december of 2010.
get into the new england conservatory.
move to boston.
masters degree in early music performance.

i'm gonna do it.

new song obsession: fact - fiction by mads langer

what am i doing....

2009-10-20T22:54:00.003-05:00

for some reason, i feel like i'm living my life with no direction.
i go to sleep at night i wake up in the morning...and i go off to school...but to do what?
what's the goal?
i have no clue.
and honestly, i don't think i care.
i think one day....hopefully soon...i'll stumble upon what my life is supposed to be.
until then...i'm going to do what i want.

"mother mary, full of grace, awaken
all our homes are gone, our loved ones taken
taken by the sea
mother mary, calm our fears, have mercy
drowning in a sea of tears, have mercy
hear our mournful plea
our world has been shaken,
we wander our homelands forsaken
in the dark night of the soul
bring some comfort to us all,
o mother mary come and carry us in your embrace
that our sorrows may be faced
mary, fill the glass to overflowing
illuminate the path where we are going
have mercy on us all
in fun'ral fires burning
each flame to your myst'ry returning
in the dark night of the soul
your shattered dreamers, make them whole,
o mother mary find us where we've fallen out of grace,
lead us to a higher place
in the dark night of the soul
our broken hearts you can make whole,
o mother mary come and carry us in your embrace,
let us see your gentle face, mary"

Requiem by Eliza Gilkyson; arr. Craig Hella Johnson
sung by Conspirare

amazing.

whoa, its been a while

2009-10-08T22:15:00.002-05:00

oops, i kind of forgot about blogging.
i'm a bad blogger.

let's see...what happened...

school started again. i'm taking a lot of hours. its slowly killing me.
i don't get enough sleep.

everyone has swine flu..either i'm next or i'm immune to it.
i'm hoping for the latter.

he turned into a total asshole, and the same situation that happened to me last year happened yet gain. except this time i did absolutely nothing to deserve it. last year, i was crazy. this year i was smart, i didn't do anything dumb...and the same shit happened. oh...and she's ugly this time. i guess i still win?

i got cast as a cover in an opera....and then my director gave me a show!!! =)
rehearsals are long and tough...but i'm loving every moment of it.
my show is october 22nd! so excited...and terrified.
its my first non-chorus role. i hope i do well...if so there's a role for me in Candide next semester. which will be amaaaaazing!

oh..and the opera takes place in a bar....which reminds me...i'm off to do extensive research tonight. lol.
=)

....missouri.....

2009-08-03T21:51:00.004-05:00

family vacation update #2

we finally made it to table rock lake in missouri yesterday around 3:30.
the drive really wasn't that bad. i think the drive to my grandparent's house in ball ground, georgia is a whole lot worse.
we got a late start today, thus we only ate dinner about 30 minutes ago. lol.

i think i spent the majority of my day on the jet ski. it was awesome.
the last time i drove something of that nature was a snow mobile in colorado.
and i almost killed myself on that adventure.
this was much less dangerous, and much more fun.
i think scared my mother who decided to join me on my jet ski adventure. i'm a little bit more aggressive with it than she thought i'd be. lol.
we watched the boys wakeboard/wakeskate/wakesurf/etc. from behind the boat.
i don't think i want to water ski this year. i'm just not in the mood. i either hurt myself somehow, or when i'm done i feel like i've been run over by a semi.

my lovely brother texted me this morning at 9:30 from the other house wondering if people were awake at this house. (we're split apart in two houses. there are a lot of us)
i really hope they let me sleep in tomorrow. i'm so insanely tired.
i think the sun completely drained me of all my energy. and the few beers i had on the lake didn't help at all.

all of the kids here are trying to crack each other's backs. i don't know why they'd willingly do that considering almost all of them are sunburned to some extent.

i always feel so strange on family trips. especially ones with other families.
because...usually the families we go with do not have children my age. they're always at least a few years younger. and its enough of a gap to where i have nothing to talk about with them. like...right now.....i'm 22....going to be 23 soon, and i might as well be 40. the oldest girl from the family we're with, who's almost 21, brought a friend, and she recently turned 21. then below that we have my brother and his girlfriend who are 19....and harry and the family's son who are both 17. and then we have the adults. so i'm stuck in the middle. like right now...the kids are watching Hook...the adults are talking about random stuff i'm not interested about (i.e. politics...finances...buying houses, etc) and i'm not into either one of those options. because along with watching Hook, the kids are talking about other weird things. and they're all drinking because they're on vacation and our parents are letting them. lol. oh family vacations. i'm pretty sure i didin't really act like that when i was their age. then again, i don't think i've ever acted my age. whatever. i don't mind it too much.

in other news...i'm sad that i'm not going to be back at my apartment on friday. =(
someone's coming into town that i really want to see, because i miss them. and i'm not getting back until saturday. and they can't stay till saturday.
sad day.
however, i think they're going to come back next week. =) which makes me happy.

i think i'm going to be lame and go to bed. lol.
or read and then go to bed.
speaking of that...i read weird books. i know that.
i like historical fiction...about weird topics.
i've accepted it, yet, all day long people have been asking me about this book i'm reading called The Witch of Cologne. and for some reason it embarasses me to tell them what the book is about. because for some reason or another i care if these people think i'm weird. =/ oh well. i like the book, and i'm going to keep reading it. i suppose they can think i'm weird. i'm sure it's not the first time they've thought that i'm weird or something.

blah. i miss my friends. i can't wait to get back to them.

okay, time to read and go to sleep.

....Arkansas...

2009-08-02T10:31:00.002-05:00

family trip update # 1

we're in arkansas...there's nothing here...as to be expected from arkansas.

my brother is freakin' hysterical....
examples:
while getting out of the car for breakfast: "oh my gosh, i feel like a new born baby dear...i'm straight-leggin' it..."

while discussing where we are: "we're in Hope, Arkansas...i HOPE we get the f*ck out of here"

oh little brother. special child.

anyways...moving on
so we're going to table rock lake in missouri.
it should be a fun week. water skiing, wakeboarding, tubing, jet skiing, hiking...etc.

in other news: chris and lindsey got married. their wedding was amazing. it was so much fun. it was great seeing everyone from high school and getting to party with them.
its so weird that one of my close friends from high school is married. we're getting older. its scary. i just hope i'm not next....or anytime soon. i'm not interested in that whole mess.

anyways, i'm getting carsick. time to listen to some music and go back to sleep. getting up at 2:30am and leaving town at 4am is a pain in the ass.
goodnight.

the library is cold

2009-06-16T12:22:00.002-05:00

its soooo cold in here!!!
ugh.

i took my first communications test this morning.
it only took me 25 minutes.
so hopefully that means i knew everything so well, it didn't take very long. =)

i'm so over this whole summer school thing.
though, i was thinking about this earlier..in high school...summer school lasted all day long. for ONE class.....i don't know how i did it for two summers.
thank goodness that is over.

so next is biology at 2.
lame.
i'm ready to be done with that class. its a drag.
and its always SO hot in there.

i can't wait for everyone to come back to town. i miss so many people right now.
life isn't the same without them around.
but i suppose its good that they're aren't here. cuz i'm in school....and i shouldn't be running around town at all hours of the night like i do when my friends are here.
i swear, i don't sleep when they're in town. but i love them anyway.

band camp is in full swing at the music building. which means my usual lunch spot has been commandeered by smelly band kids and their directors.
lame.
it also means that i have to find another spot to charge my macbook.
which means i'm stuck in the frigid library. lol.

in other news...i'm ordering a new swimsuit today. i cannot wait. SO CUTE.

and i need a hair cut. just a trim though.
i'm not chopping all of it off yet, though i'd REALLY love to. =/

okay, off to catch the bus and head to biology.

home

2009-06-14T12:25:00.002-05:00

i'm at home, in houston. visiting the family.

we went to the house of blues last night. it was good. however, this wonderful diet limited my enjoyment of the food.

i mean, i like chicken and all...but...not boring, bland chicken.

and i forced myself to eat green beans. which i don't typically like.

however, if you pour like....a tablespoon of salt over them, they taste more like edamame. which i LOVE. so i guess its good i figured out a way to eat them.

green veggies are good for you.

speaking of this diet. i'd like to think its working. but its only been a week. so i really have no clue. my mother thinks its a bad idea because i'm not eating that much. but i eat every 3-4 hours. and its all pretty healthy. lots of vitamins, protein....etc. so it can't be THAT bad for me. and yeah...its not a lot of calories, but the only way to lose weight is to lessen your caloric intake. and that's what i'm doing.

we'll see how it goes.

OH.....my best friend got engaged. and she asked me to be her maid of honor.

SO EXCITED.

the ring is gorgeous.

i'm really happy for her and her fiance.

i love her like a sister, and he's the perfect man for her.

i can't wait for all the planning and decision making.

i like planning weddings...however i really don't like going to them. unless i'm getting paid to sing. lol. cuz that's some good money. :)

okay, time to shop with my mother.

<3>

its just another saturday....

2009-05-30T09:30:00.006-05:00

“ Missing someone isn’t about how long it’s been since you’ve seen them last or the amount of time since you last talked. It’s about that very moment when you’re doing something and you wish that they were right there with you."

__________________________________

i don't care how you come back...please just come back soon.
i miss you terribly.

equality.

2009-05-29T14:03:00.002-05:00

down with exxonmobil.
"ExxonMobil Says Yes to Gay Bias"

now, i'm not gay. i'm a straight woman.
however, i believe everyone should have equal rights.
i do not believe people discriminate against others who have a different sexual orientation or gender from them.
it's not your life. it does not affect your life.
so, leave theirs be.

i just hope people can get over their issues and just accept people for who they are and not try and interfere. because, they're people too, and they deserve every right everyone else has.

so i'm boycotting exxonmobil.
because that is BS.

i hate....

2009-05-27T10:47:00.006-05:00

packing.

oh my lord, do i hate packing.

there is SO MUCH STUFF in this damn apartment.
i started, but i don't know if it was in the right place. lol.
gahhh! too much.
but i have a week to get it all done.

in other news....
i have reignited my love for Zelda on N64.
i've been playing nonstop.
and thank the little baby jesus for walkthroughs.
because it's been a lonnnng time. lol.

kk...back to packing.
=(

crasssssy!

2009-05-16T14:55:00.003-05:00

this is what i witnessed today at TFMC.

she looks like an escapee from a tibetan mental hospital.
scary.

summer time...and the livin' is easy

2009-05-16T08:37:00.005-05:00

school's out....
for now..summer school starts in June.

i hate summer school. its a waste of time. i could be doing other things....
like sleeping.

in other news...i'm working the Texas Federation of Music Clubs Festival.
boring.

i just sit here all day long outside the recital hall and play on my laptop and police the entrance.
joy.

i can't wait for today to be ooooover.
i'm exhausted.
and a little upset about life in general.
its not exactly going as planned right now...
hopefully it'll all get better with time.

i guess all i can do now is pray and stay close to the people that love me.

on a completely unrelated topic:
WTF season finales.

Lost: wtf wtf wtf. i could barely concentrate.
and who the hell was that random guy that kept finding his way into everyone's lives!?
and i'm so sad that next season is the last season. i freakin' love this show. however it can only really go so far. unless they wanna keep inventing monsters....there's already a smoke monster....what else would they come up with? a water monster....a monster made of leaves?
nah. that's probably why they're ending it.

Bones: WHAT THE EFFFFFFFFF?!?!?!??!?!?!?
that was seriously the MOST confusing episode of bones EVER.
and how it started!?!! talk about a mindfu*k!
and what a TEASE!
and then the ending....are you SERIOUS!?
that shit better fix itself by next season, or i'm gonna lose my mind.

Lie to Me: it was alright....a little crazy.
way different topic than i'm used to.
but i haven't been watching that show very long.
it was still good.
the ending was a little boring. it left it very open ended with no direction.
which makes me nervous, because i'd like it to come back for another season.

Fringe: this is another show i haven't been watching for very long.
it was definitely a trip though.
energy cells hidden in people's arms....
robotic arms....wtf?
i'm starting to like that show. its a little weird, but its still interesting.

GREY'S ANATOMY: OH MY GOOD GOD IN HEAVEN.
SERIOUSLY!??!?!!?!?!?!?!?!
that was two hours of pure hell.
first of all....i was not in the right mental state to be watching such a sad episode.
there were so many twists and turns.
and the ending....oh my lord. too much for me to handle.
TOO DAMN MUCH.
i wonder how they're going to tie that mess up at the beginning of next season.
there's talk of both characters leaving the show...so who knows what'll happen.
i really wish they'd both stay. i like their characters.

i can't believe i have to wait all summer to watch my shows again.

OH....new shows:

Glee: i am SO excited about this show.
as a choir nerd i take pride in my show choir experience.
and this new show is ALL about show choir. =)
yay!!
hopefully it'll open some people's minds to choir and the necessity for it.
if not, it'll be entertaining at least.
either way, i'm excited.
its gonna be on hulu.com on the 20th.
i can't wait!! =)

okay, enough on TV shows....for now.

p.s. if you need to watch any of these season finales visit

www.hulu.com for Bones, Lie to Me, and Fringe

and

www.abc.com for Lost and Grey's Anatomy

ohhhhh life.....

2009-04-29T16:37:00.000-05:00

SWINE FLU!!!!

run for the hills.
whatev.

things are looking up.
i'm hopeful again.
i have something to look forward to.
someone to look forward to.
i like this feeling.

NATS!

2009-04-05T22:56:00.002-05:00

NATS: national association of teacher of singing.

this past saturday i competed in the district competition of NATS.
and i kicked ass.
2nd place in the senior women's division.
hot damn.
the same girl who beat me last year got first again though. BOO.
but its okay. 2nd is better than nothing.
and considering i memorized my german song the night before, i'd say that's pretty damn good.

this is the last week of the pledge process for the candidates for my fraternity.
i have a feeling its going to be a rough week. lots of late nights and stressing out.
we have to decide which ones we want to join our organization. its a big decision to make.

also, next weekend we decide who the new executive officers are.
i'm running for recording secretary again. because, well....i'm a badass when it comes to that office. everything is done on time. no questions asked.
so hopefully i'll get re-elected. =)

okay, off to bed, lesson in the morning.
p.s. 9am is way too early to sing.

"all men are whores"

2009-03-30T22:51:00.002-05:00

yes, friends, "all men ARE whores".
according to my opera director.
i'm not sure why he says that phrase so often.
or when he decided it.
but, he's right.

i staged my opera scene today with the above mentioned director.
which is where i heard is favorite above mentioned phrase.

i'm going to have a problem with this scene.
the character i'm playing has been completely beaten down by her husband. she barely has strength or courage enough to pick up her feet and walk across a room.
its truly sad.
she hates her husband. she can't stand him. yet after everything...
she still loves him.
my director asked me if i've ever been in that kind of relationship. to which i responded:
"do you remember how messed up i was last semester.....yeah....i was there. i know what its like"
so he says:

GOOD! use it!

he's a wonderful person and director.
and i respect him. a lot.
but.

i cannot do that.
i cannot dredge up everything from last semester.
i did it for just a few minutes today....and it left me in ruins for the rest of the day.
it was awful.
all the prozac in the world won't be able to fix me if i do this.

and i want to be flexible and i want to work hard on this scene and make it amazing.
but i can only go so far.
i have to draw the line.
i can't do this.
its too soon to think about everything again.
i've spent so much time putting all of my pain in a box and letting it sink to the bottom of the ocean. (read all of it)

i'm not going out in a boat to fish it back up again.
i refuse.

sunday

2009-03-29T17:57:00.003-05:00

i don't particularly like sundays.
everything seems rushed.
i don't typically have lots of homework on the weekends.
but i still feel like there's a dark cloud over my sundays.
probably because i have a voice lesson on monday morning. and that stresses me out.

so i'm sitting here with my big.
she's "studying" for biology. ew.
i should be studying for diction. but i'm lazy. so it ain't happening.

today we worked on the mail-outs for choir camp.
we had a fool-proof system going. we're bamfs.

tomorrow chorale and university singers are combining our rehearsals to help audition new grad students for the school of music.
this wouldn't be a problem.
BUT.....
chorale has to go in and sightread two pieces:
the rutter gloria
and
britten's rejoice in the lamb

the gloria isn't that hard....however. the britten is. BOOOOO.
=(

more later.

KITTENS.

2009-03-26T19:53:00.001-05:00

oh my lord.
i laughed....out loud....alone in my room whilst watching this.

observe.

things my friends say. volume 1.

2009-03-26T15:50:00.001-05:00

"its like driving a bulldozer through a field of daisies"

"i'm going to set the gay mafia on him!"

more later....

things my roommate says. volume 1.

2009-03-25T23:35:00.002-05:00

"the britney bun can be comfortable...if you're cleaning...or going into a truck stop..."

amazing.

"show me my opponent"

2009-03-25T18:01:00.002-05:00

so today i was being a good person and giving my best friend a ride from the music building to her apartment. my normal route was blocked because there's either a baseball or softball game tonight on campus. however, i don't know how much fun that'll be considering the sky is about to open up.

so i went a different route.
and i saw the most interesting vehicle.
it was a 98 or 99 (i couldn't fully tell) beige lincoln town car .
and on the back was the phrase
"show me my opponent"
which i recognized from a song that my best friend and i used to listen to.
stuntin' like my daddy by birdman and lil wayne
oh did i mention that said town car had hydraulics.
yeah. special.

moving on.

I LOVE THREE SHEETS!
i've been watching it nonstop on hulu.com.
aaamazing.
i'm currently watching an episode in which he's in IRELAND!!!
and since i'm irish...it makes me happy.
=)
i need to go there. i think it would be cool to learn gaelic.
though, i've heard its hard as hell.

holy hell...okay...the weather just got bad. AHHH!!

i love thunderstorms.
(=

"is this vodka flavored gum?"

2009-03-24T17:48:00.004-05:00

yes..my friend really asked me that today after i handed him a piece of this:

moving right along...

as stated on my Twitter account:

if you have dark hair, use dark hair accessories.

if you have light hair, use light hair accessories.

if your hair is BLEACH blonde, do not for any reason use a black hair-tie.
i mean seriously. it looks ridiculous.

come on ladies, get it together.

you said hi to me, and i smiled at you.
i regret it. i should have continued to ignore you, its much more fun that way.

i have new favorite websites.

i really don't like celebrities or their drama. i don't care who they're dating, or who they're cheating with. i don't care when they get married or divorced.
i do not care.
however, i've been reading Perez Hilton's website every day.
multiple times a day.
and i can't stop.
at least now i have something to talk about with my roommate, who reads it religiously.

now for a much better website.
f my life.
i LOVE it.
its awful, but it reminds me that my life isn't THAT tragic.
i hate that i benefit from other's horrible situations.
but, whatever, they willingly contribute.

so i saw i love you, man.
it was pretty damn hysterical.
it reminded me of two of my friends i go to school with.
what's with this bromace explosion lately.
maybe its because more men are gay and they're afraid to come out. so they go on man-dates and have bromances to cover it up.

gentlemen, if you like boys...just come out.
your real friends aren't going to care.
promise.

in other news:
I WANT TO CUT MY HAIR.
i'm so sick of having to deal with my hair being this damn long.
maybe something like this.
but maybe not. i dunno.
i might just go to my hairdresser and say: do what you want!
and let them go crazy.

enough for now.

i dont want to go back to school

2009-03-22T22:34:00.003-05:00

so spring break was interesting.

i went home.
i didn't go camping.
i went to dallas instead.

which was interesting.

lots and lots and LOTS of drinking.
lots of dark beer.
and delicious irish car bombs.
it was a fun weekend. :)

however...there are 45 minutes of friday night that i cannot account for.
it upsets me because i always remember everything when i drink.

i have a new favorite place to drink though: the flying saucer.
its a freakin' beer heaven.
ammmaaazing!

spring break should be two weeks long.
one week just isn't enough.
i guess that's just how life goes.

i want new sunglasses. i kinda wanna give wayfarers a try.
i also want to go shopping. and spend a ridiculous amount of money. however. i don't have the money to play with.

i love Bones.
its amazing. i think that's where i'm getting the wayfarers idea from. one of the main characters has been wearing them. i think they're fun. and deliciously retro.

annnd time for bed.
school tomorrow.
<3

its been too long

2009-03-18T13:47:00.003-05:00

oops....i kind of fell off the face of the earth for a while.
the opera consumed my life. as usual.
it was great though. everyone enjoyed the show. and the cast had SO much fun.
thus it was worth it.

so now i'm on spring break.
joy.
and for some reason i decided to come home for a few days.
there's nothing going on here. which kind of sucks. and everyone is either not here or MIA. which is fine. its giving me a chance to catch up with my family.
though, all my brothers want from me is to make a run to the liquor store for them. they're such delinquents. oh well. i guess i wasn't any better at their age.

yesterday was st. patrick's day.
which i must say is one of my favorite holidays for the following reasons:

1. i'm irish
2. it gives me an excuse to drink heavily
3. for some reason green beer just tastes better than regular beer
4. irish car bombs are a gift from god

so what did i do for st. paddy's day?
i went out with my parents and their raunchy friends.
i thought i'd be bored out of my mind. but it turned out to be a lot of fun.
then i went out to some random bar with a friend from high school.
that was interesting.

but enough on yesterday's debauchery.

i think i'm going camping this weekend. it should prove to be interesting.
though, this time the overnight lows won't be 28degrees like they were the last time i went camping. thank GOD for body heat and layers.

okay. back to lounging around my parent's house and watching House on Hulu!

<3>

ABC....

2009-02-08T14:26:00.002-06:00

A
- Available: yes.
- Age: 22
- Animal: elephants! cats....small dogs..my turtles
- Actor: Lee Pace, Zach Braff
- Actress: Zooey Deschanel, Emily Deschanel, Anne Hathaway

B

- Birthday: November 9
- Best Friend: Cody, Catherine, Schraeder
- Best feeling in the world: a really good performance
- Blind or Deaf: blind. music is too important. i couldn't imagine living without it.
- Best weather: cold and snowy or cold and sunny...ish
- Been on stage?: Yes, too many times to count.
- Believe in yourself?: sometimes
- Believe in life on other planets: eh, maybe
- Believe in miracles: yes
- Believe in Magic: undecided.
- Believe in Satan: yes
- Believe in Santa: not anymore.

C
- Car: 05 toyota corolla s
- Candy: HEATH! german and english candy
- Color: green, black, purple
- Chocolate/Vanilla: vanilla
- Cake or pie: pie...unless its tres leches
- Countries to visit: i like mexico. i want to go to italy, germany, england, ireland, russia, australia, greece, south africa, denmark, and a ton of other places.

D
- Day or Night: night
- Danced: every monday, tuesday, and thursday. oh opera rehearsal.
- Dance in the rain?: i'll probably just get sick.

E
- Eyes: green.
- Everyone has a: passion
- Ever failed a class?: yeah. :(

F
- Full name: .....AMH that's all you people are getting.
- First thoughts waking up: lately...."ugh...i'm still sick....seriously!?"
- Food: greek, mexican, tex-mex, pizza, thai, american, fusion, south american. basically everything....i mean...come on....i'm a foodie.

G
- Greatest Fear: falling, heights, spending my life completely alone
- Giver or taker: both.
- Gum: I LOVE gum...i'm addicted
- Get along with your parents?: yup....95% of the time.
- Good luck charm: my Saint Cecilia medal

H
- Hair Color: brown
- Height: 5' 3'' ish
- Happy: ish
- Holiday: Halloween and Christmas
- Hate: doing dishes, people who lie, stupid people

I
- Ice Cream: cherry garcia!
- Instrument: voice

J
- Jewelry: anything vintage and gaudy. lol.

K
- Kids: .....about that....no.
- Kickboxing or karate: yoga?
- Keep a journal?: i'm blogging, that's enough for now.

L
- Longest Car Ride: san marcos to nashville....on a crowded tour bus with 20 guys and 3 girls
- Letter: um...A?
- Laughed so hard you cried: oh yeah all the time
- Love at first sight: i want to believe in it

LAST PERSON WHO...
1. Slept in a bed beside you?: my friend coty on chorale tour
2. Saw you cry?: my whole opera class
3. Went to the movies with you?: uhm.....don't remember
4. You went to the mall with?: my mom, grandmother, two aunts, and three cousins
5. You went to dinner with?: people in my fraternity
6. You talked to on the phone?: catherine
7. Made you laugh?: audrey/christian

M
- Milk flavor: chocolate!
- Mooned anyone?: hell no.
- Marriage?: i'm not counting on it.
- Motion sickness?: all the damn time. :(
- McD's or BK?: BK lounge

N
- Number of Siblings: 2.5
- Number of Piercings: One hole in each ear

O
- Overused Phrases: "oh my shit"
- One wish: to be happy and sucessful

P
- Place you'd like to live: boston!
- Perfect Pizza: cheese, light sauce, banana peppers, pepperoni, green olives.
- Pepsi/Coke: pepsi

Q
-Quail: delicious.

R
- Reason to cry: I have so much to do

S
- Song: i will always love Danny Boy
- Shoe size: 8
- Salad Dressing: Ceasar, ranch, chipotle ranch
- Sushi: california rolls
- Scent: sensual amber, black raspberry vanilla, vanilla, any spiced scents, good food cooking in a kitchen
-Skipped school: yes..
- Slept outside: twice
- Seen a dead body?: only at funerals
- Smoked?: yes
- Skinny dipped?: goodness, no.
- Shower Daily?: of course
- Sing well?: i'd like to think so
- In the shower?: rarely
- Swear?: too often.
- Stuffed Animals?: yes
- Strawberries/Blueberries: Strawberries.
- Scientists need to invent: a miracle weight loss pill that wont kill you at the same time

T
- Time for bed: midnight?
- Thunderstorms: i love them as long as i can stay in my room
- TV: grey's anatomy, pushing daisies (even though they cancelled it), lost, bones, house, csi, anything on the food network, no reservations
- Touch your tongue to your nose? nope

U
- Unpredictable: sort of

V
- Vegetable you love: carrots (even though i'm allergic to them), edamame, celery
- Vacation spot: Cabo San Lucas, Cancun, NYC, Breckenridge, Chicago, New Orleans

W
- Weakness: really good food or music
- When you grow up: i want to be happy
- Which one of your friends acts the most like you: cody
- Who makes you laugh the most: pepper, lori, josh, cody, coty, jasin
- Worst feeling: sadness
- Wanted to be a model?: um...no
- Where do we go when we die: it depends on how you lived your life while living
- Worst weather: hot and humid.

X
-X-Rays: teeth...wrist

Y
-Year it is now: 2009
-Yellow: used to look better on me.

Z
- Zoo animal: elephant
- Zodiac sign: scorpio

February Theme: Want

2009-02-05T14:43:00.002-06:00

according to NaBloPoMo...this month's theme is WANT.

i WANT my voice to come back.

i WANT to be able to breathe normally without wheezing.

i WANT the weather to stay cold.

i WANT the weekends to last longer.

i WANT opera rehearsal to be easy tonight...unlike tuesday night.

wednesdays shouldn't be this stessful

2009-02-04T17:48:00.002-06:00

so...its wednesday.
which means normally means its an easy day and it ends pretty quickly.

however, today was different.

in opera workshop we're working on trust so we can better understand the exercises we do.

so...our professor had us sit across from someone and stare at them for an unknown amount of time. we were told to look past their facades and see who they really are. see into their souls.

i'm great with my facade. most people i know can't get past it by just looking at me.
except for two people in my class.
mid exercise we just started crying. uncontrollably.
it was pathetic.
yet...comforting to know there are people in my life who i trust enough to let in to my soul like that. so i guess that confirms that i don't have a heart of stone and ice.
i do have a soul.

who woulda guessed that...?

oh hell...

2009-02-03T23:11:00.002-06:00

i've already screwed up. lol.
i didn't blog yesterday.

damnit.

i'll keep blogging every day anyway.

so we had to stage a new scene in opera today...and lucky me...i have to dance with my ex. for probably the whole show.
JOY.

at least it isn't the most recent ex. that would be traumatizing.

i'm going to damage the vast majority of the singers in my section.
they royally screwed up one of our performances today.
i'm not happy.

annnd, now i'm going to bed.

:)

NaBloPoMo Month: Day One

2009-02-01T21:44:00.018-06:00

today starts my NaBloPoMo

http://nablopomo.ning.com/
i decided to start if off with something simple and interesting.
a google image survey!

Age:

Place I've Been:

Favorite Place:
Favorite Object:
Favorite Animal:
Favorite Color:
Favorite Restaurant:
Birthplace:
Current Place:
Pets:
Best Friend: they shall remain nameless. :)
Nickname:
Name:
Grandmother's Name:
Bad Habit:
First Job:
College Degree:
What I'm Doing Right Now:
well...i'm not sleeping quite yet...but i'm about to!

and in other news...
THE STEELERS WON!!!!!!!!!
HELL YEAH!!!

tra la la

2009-01-29T15:02:00.004-06:00

i'm in history 1320 right now.
bored out of my mind.

i like history. but...not this much. i'd rather not sit here for over an hour two days a week and listen to this old man ramble. though i will say that this history teacher is exponentially more entertaining than my music history teacher who is literally a talking fossil. he was at my university over 10 years ago, and now he's back to fill in for another professor while he's overseas.

i think next month i'm going to do NaBlPoMo.
aka: National Blog Posting Month
its simple...post one blog every day for a whole month.
i think i can do it.
most posts wont be too long, because Lord knows i don't have the time for lengthy posts.
and the content probably won't be legitimate material.
but i don't care.
and since no one really reads this...it really won't matter.
:)

in other news: i want a Coexist sticker for my car.

even though it'll greatly irritate my parents.
because they don't really believe in tolerance. where as i think its necessary for peace and stability in this world of hate and intolerance.

love everyone, no matter what religion they practice, no matter which political party they voted for, no matter what color their skin is.

the first week of school is always the craziest....

2009-01-26T00:52:00.002-06:00

i always hate the first week of school.

its so hectic.
it stresses me out.

i had my first catering gig this weekend.
i was SO nervous.
i mean, i've cooked for a lot of people. but they know me and they'll like my food no matter what. but...cooking for 40 people i'd never ever met...that's a lot for me to deal with.

i surprised myself. i did a damn good job.
everyone liked the food.
no one complained.
and i was asked to make everything again at another event in February.
=)

however, the stress from that event and school starting got me sick.
i slept ALL day today.
it was a little ridiculous.
and i'm still exhausted.
and i have a voice lesson at 9am!
which means...i should be sleeping.
but TLC sucked me into its ridiculous programming.
i don't even like weddings....and i'm sitting here watching stuff about weddings and finding the perfect dress and other related bullshit.

turning off the tv...and the computer...and hopefully my brain, which as always, its moving at 100mph.
goodnight.

january...

2009-01-18T11:42:00.002-06:00

January has been interesting thus far.

chorale tour was fun.
there was way too much of the following:

time on the bus/traveling
rehearsal
black choir dresses
waking up early
going to bed too late
singing
DRINKING....good gracious there was WAY too much of that.

school starts on Tuesday.
i'm not looking forward to that.
mainly because its going to be an insanely busy semester:

new pledges
opera (the student prince)
TMEA
TMEA Chorale Performance
Early Music Ensemble
my quartet
a capella group
baby NATS
oh and not to mention actual school work....oh my hell.
its going to be a long semester.

and i've recently decided that after graduation, i want to move to Boston.
yup....Boston.
they have an amazing early music scene there.
i think i'll fit in quite nicely.

Television

2009-01-08T17:43:00.003-06:00

i am obsessed
with
House
and
Bones

completely obsessed.

its a little bit ridiculous.

in other news: i need something new and exciting in my life. i'm getting really bored with this mediocrity.
any suggestions?

back "home"

2009-01-06T12:17:00.002-06:00

as much as i LOVED being home....i'm glad to be back at my apartment.

i slept better.
my bed at home is great...but i'm so used to this one.

it was hard leaving my mom though.
she never likes it when i leave.

in other news...i've recently become re-addicted to jazz....mainly ella fitzgerald/billie holiday/pink martini/etc.

and its at the perfect time too...one of my songs for my quartet requires a jazz influence.
woot. yay for perfect timing.
=)

hate

2009-01-02T11:58:00.002-06:00

i hate you.

i hate that you still care.

leave me alone so i can heal.

home

2009-01-01T23:35:00.002-06:00

so i'm still at home. i don't want to go back to my apartment yet. i think i'm afraid to.

i just want to feel better. and i think being here...at home...with my family is helping. because i know that no matter what i do, they'll always love me. and i have some friends that are like that...but...family is more permanent than friendship.

my ex keeps emailing me...asking me if i'm okay. and i've been ignoring it. because the truth is....
I'M NOT OKAY.
and i'm not okay because of him. because he made me feel worthless. and i bottled up that emotion for a long time. and when i let it out, it tore me apart.

now i could respond and tell him everything's fine. but he knows me better than that. he'll know i'm lying. i also can't tell him its his fault. because he'll feel horrible. and even though he made me feel like shit, i can't do that to him. i'm going to be the better person. karma will get him soon enough. or at least i hope it will.

in a totally unrelated topic...i got to cook tonight. it was great.
rosemary mashed potatoes and my cornbread. it was great. the family loved it. even my three year old cousins enjoyed it. i love cooking...it makes me happy and calms my soul.
it also provides a great opportunity to drink with my mother.
between myself, my mother, and my aunt...we went through about 3 bottles of wine.
classic family gathering.
i love it.

...ugh

2008-12-27T16:29:00.001-06:00

i
am
hungover.

but
it
was
worth
it.

i
spent
all
day
in
bed.

that
was
worth
it
too.

:)

merry christmas

2008-12-25T14:25:00.004-06:00

merry christmas.

and for some reason....i have no desire to listen to christmas music...i want to listen to a mass for the dead....its strange i know.

listening to: Verdi Requiem with Joan Sutherland, Luciano Pavarotti, Marilyn Horne, and Martti Talvela

day 2 of recovery. i don't feel any different.

and i don't feel like hanging out w/ my extended family today either....wtf is wrong with me...?

a year....

2008-12-23T23:00:00.002-06:00

its been a year since something started in my life...

its over now, and it's been that way for a while.

its amazing to me how in a years time so much can happen. and in the end...its back to like it was before.
as if it had never happened.
as if we had never met.
as if we were never even friends.

its bullshit.

knitting....

2008-12-22T02:07:00.002-06:00

i seriously cannot stop knitting.

its like a drug.

but better.

however...there is a downside to this whole craze...

my back is SO TENSE!

and i wish i could read and knit at the same time...but i'd need another arm for that. thus its impossible. :(

p.s. i have fallen in love with Something Corporate again.

waking up

2008-12-21T08:18:00.003-06:00

it's odd waking up in a place you're not used to....with different sounds...smells...fabrics...etc.

I can't wait to be home. I miss waking up to those sounds...smells...fabrics...etc.

I miss my brothers trying to drag me out of bed at some ridiculous hour to go do some mundane task with them just so they can spend more time with me.

I miss drinking wine around the kitchen island with my mom before dinner.

I miss watching the discovery channel with my dad really early in the morning...and eating our favorite cold breakfast...cheerios with cut up bananas in super cold milk with sugar sprinkled on top.

yah...I miss home. but I'll be there by sundown.

it's gonna be a good day

thoughts on christmas: decor

2008-12-20T02:06:00.008-06:00

i'm in the holiday spirit today...probably because i'm getting to go home and visit my family for more than two days this year. i'm really looking forward to it.

since i'm no longer living at home, i decided to decorate my apartment so i can enjoy the season just as much as anyone else. plus...i like to decorate, so why not? :)
this got me thinking....how do other people decorate?
i love the way my mom decorates the house, especially the inside. its very thought out, classy, and practical. nothing over the top or gaudy. well, okay, it's a little gaudy. but you can't do christmas without getting just a little tacky.

i love my little tree that i have in my apartment. its small....but so is the apartment. so it works.
we even have stockings. adorable. i know. mine's the green one of course.

i think this tree is wonderful. its a little too pale for my tastes. but i like the concept.
loooove it! i think more than anything i like the space in which its been placed.
okay. this is trashy. but i suppose my younger brothers would appreciate this more than i.

...why don't we do it this way?

gifts...

2008-12-20T01:30:00.009-06:00

december brings presents....of all kind....thus far, i've recieved a handfull of gifts.

my secret santa brought me wonderful red wine glasses, a new can opener, and a spoon rest. all of which were greatly appreciated and much needed. especially the can opener, considering one of mine broke last week.

my roommate being the smart ass she is got me this:

however, i wish it were really that easy to snag a man. lol.

one of my best friends made me a box to put my recipes in...which was also greatly needed. they're currently in a shoe box....ghetto!

its SO damn cute!! it goes perfectly with my red/black kitchen. :)

speaking of gifts.....i'm making gifts for people. i have two 3 year old girl cousins..they're twins....so of course they're adorable. i decided to knit them scarves. they probably won't use them now...but i'm sure they will in a few years. they live about an hour north of chicago...so unless global warming is legit....they'll need them. anyways...i learned how to put fringe on scarves this week, so of course...i put fringe on the finished one.the bottom one isn't done yet....but hopefully it'll be done by tomorrow.
after that its on to a scarf for my mother. which i still need to get the yarn for...i'm unhappy with my original selection.

i always feel bad about gifts. i never have money to spend. and handmade things take a long time. and then there's always the dilemma of deciding who gets a gift and who doesn't. so often i just don't get anyone anything. but then i feel bad.

oh the holidays...tis the season to be...guilty.

what the hell....

2008-12-17T03:22:00.001-06:00

you think you can trust someone, and you think they've changed.....and then....they fall back into their same old bullshit ways.

i mean seriously...what the hell.

had i known you were wasted i would have never gone over there. though i should have known that if its past 12:30am and you're talking to me you're obviously drunk and there's only one thing you want from me and its not my company. too bad i'm not that girl anymore. nor will i ever be. i'm older, wiser, i respect myself more...something you obviously don't do. and you don't respect women...or the word 'no'.
i wonder who else knows you act like this when you drink....i wonder if your parents know...or your sister.....maybe i should tell them. they'd believe me.
but no, i won't do that. not right before christmas. that would be horrible...."Merry Christmas...your son is a drunken pervert!"

why do men feel they can act like that?? why do they think women will just go along with it??
i know why...its because at one point in time in their lives....a woman did just go along with it, and because men don't learn from their failures only their successes thus they think all women are like that.

well here's a NEWSFLASH boys....we don't want to go along with it...and when we say NO....it means freakin' NO. it doesn't mean any weird translation that you think you can come up with, it means what it means. no hidden meanings. no teasing. no playfulness. it means no. end of story....GOT IT?!

and thank GOD for my roommate. had it not been for her....i'd still be stuck there, fighting that asshole off. and thank goodness for him...i almost broke his damn nose. i hope it never comes to that....i don't want to get physically violent with him...or anyone for that matter. but after all the bullshit that's happened to people i know involving sexual assault...i refuse to let it happen to me. i'm stronger than that. i love myself too much.

that's enough for tonight...i'm angry enough as it is...if i keep writing i'll be up all night bitching about how much of an asshole you are.

the beginning of christmas break and other thoughts...

2008-12-17T02:53:00.004-06:00

so, christmas break is starting...and i’ve done a whole lot of nothing. in fact....all i’ve done is lay in bed, watch CSI, knit, and drink wine....not the whole time of course....just with dinner....i’m not my mother yet.

i’m watching True Life on TV....this episode is about three girls who live their lives online because they’re incapable of doing it in person. they’re crazy! though.....i fear that i’ll end up just like them. relying on relationships formed online...oh hell, i hope i don’t end up on freakin’ eharmony or any other equally obnoxious “compatibility site”. ugh, the horror. even though my aunt met her husband on there and now has beautiful twin girls...i don’t want to be like her. i don’t want to be 35 still single and jaded thanks to the immense amount of idiots that inhabit this earth...and then turn to the internet to “complete” my obviously boring and worthless life.
how sad would that be?

i guess that just means i have to do everything in my power to prevent that from happening....

ready......set......

GO.